Falling in Love with the Whole Family


 


My favourite family in all fiction is Hilary McKay’s Casson family – there’s a series, starting with Saffy’s Angel. That's the one I want to belong to – I explained here that all the children have colour names, and I encouraged others to choose their colour in case Hilary wants to adopt us (go on, H). I am Alabama Crimson, a minx who tosses her hair a lot. One time on Twitter loads of us pitched in picking names – writers, readers, editors, publishers – it’s amazing how many people love the Casson books. And in addition they are ideal reading for someone who is ill

See  Best Book for a Convalescent

It is fair to say I fell in love with them.

When Nancy Mitford first read (in 1944) an advance copy of Evelyn Waugh’s Brideshead Revisited, she sent the author, a close friend, a most enthusiastic letter, including this:

 “so true to life being in love with a whole family”.

I wrote about the book in the Guardian more than 10 years ago

Guardian Books Blog: Brideshead Revisited by Evelyn Waugh

A piece that I was and am very pleased with – I reread it recently when that film Saltburn came out. I might seem to be arguing with Nancy (as if!) because I say Sebastian’s love for Charles is the driving force, but Charles is clearly seduced by the house and its occupants. He does betray Sebastian, just as Sebastian expected. Nancy M asks Evelyn ‘Are you, or are you not on Lady Marchmain’s side?’

Evelyn says – intriguingly – ‘No I am not on her side, but God is…’ It has to be said, a mother trying to stop her clearly-alcoholic son from drinking is not seen as such a hate figure when you read the book again in later life…

So this led me on to thinking about falling in love with fictional families: what a tempting subject that is, and one that I’m sure readers will want to join in on.

There are several different ideas here.

There are books where a character becomes enchanted with a family that offers something they don’t get in their own life. That would be Brideshead, and also Nancy Mitford’s own Pursuit of Love and Love in a Cold Climate (tags below). Fanny the cousin – an only child whose parents have effectively abandoned her – sinks into the warmth and friendliness and noise when she visits the Radletts’ home, Alconleigh. She loves all her cousins unquestioningly – as they love her.

One of my favourite books from 40 years ago was Barbara Trapido’s Brother of the More Famous Jack, which (apart from giving a lovely phrase structure in its title, I borrowed it actually for Evelyn Waugh’s brother Alec) is just wonderful. Student heroine Katherine becomes enmeshed with the  Goldman family: her tutor, his Bohemian wife Jane, their six children. Their life, their lifestyle, their house in the country, their messy way of living: she becomes part of it all. Much of it seems as if it will be familiar tropes, cliches, but it is not. These are real people and real feelings and real conversations.

I have just reread it, so will do a separate post on it soon.




Another category is one we have discussed in the comments (at length) recently: books where there is an eccentric family whom the author obviously loves, and expects the readers to love too.

I am very un-enchanted by these on the whole, and the comments suggest others feel the same.

Agatha Christie (with her cool unsentimental eye) wasn’t particularly prone to this but she fell in the otherwise very accomplished The Hollow. Lucy Angkatell and her houseful of friends and relations, with the servants sorting everything for her, and adoring her – bleah. I find her deeply uncharming, and the whole setup ripe for being swept away in a communist revolution.

Ngaio Marsh is a more obvious offender, and we have to face up to the awful example of the Lampreys. I hold my hand up: when I was a young teenager I thought A Surfeit of Lampreys was a wonderful book, and the family within were  eccentric, amusing, Bohemian rule-breakers. Reading the book again at an advanced age, I was horrified by them. Shameful snobbish frauds, the whole lot, without a shred of morality.

In my recent post on Annoying Detectives, I also took umbrage at Inspector Alleyn (in a different book) having these thoughts as he enters a house.

As he lit his pipe he was visited by a strange thought. It came into his mind that he stood on the threshold of a new relationship, that he would return to this old room and again sit before the fire.

He is on his way to INTERVIEW SUSPECTS. Unprejudiced, much? It probably wasn’t the fault of the family concerned, but still.

There was a similar situation in her False Scent.

Patricia Moyes gave us a very annoying bunch of eccentrics, the Manciple family, in Murder Fantastical – again a self-consciously quirky crew all completely selfish and self-centred, and rather stupid. I did not like them at all. (Great garden fete in the book though, for my continuing theme)

That post brought a suggestion from Johan, a staunch blogfriend whose recommendations are normally very reliable.

Johan: I nominate the Bodenheim family and the Cripps Clan from Martha Grimes "The Anodyne Necklace". Both are written for laughs and are caricatures for comic effect. I haven't read the book in over thirty years so they might not be so funny anymore.

I said then – haven’t read a Grimes for ages. A few pages in I remembered why. Like Elizabeth George, Grimes seems never to have set foot in England. The book is set in a village which is in Hereford and is also 40 miles from London (no), and in the previous few years has changed its name (no) and had a railway station added to its amenities (no). I suppose it may not matter that all these things are completely impossible, because Littlebourne has been beamed down from Planet Grimes. So is it reasonable that it is the least convincing English village I have ever found? Because I am so pedantic, I was very unentertained by the 2 x families, one rich one poor… 

The book does feature poison-pen letters, a jewel robbery in the past, and a village fete, so has a bingo line of Clothes in Books recent interests. Others may enjoy it. There is one good clue – the map ‘of the village' and what it resembles. The other clue – she was probably unlucky – concerns an abbreviation I don’t believe anyone has ever used. This is plonked in, not mentioned again till the final pages, and puzzled me enough to make me realize something about a character. Case solved, early doors. But as I say, that may be just bad luck. And I probably will feature the fortune teller at the garden fete in a future post…




And now we go back to the beginning for the third category -  the books where the reader falls in love with a whole family. That’s me with the Cassons, the Radletts, and the Mortmains in I Capture the Castle (though all three have problematic fathers).

So who else has fallen in love with a family? Or resisted the charms of the darling eccentrics? Which authors wrote great family scenes? I’m expecting great joy in the comments.


Photos of families: 

More Power to your elbow sir! | The old catchphrase for Powe… | Flickr

Gloria Vanderbilt - 1 (LOC) | Frissell, Toni,, 1907-1988,, p… | Flickr

 Yoder Family on Train, Japan | Caption: Yoder family on a tr… | Flickr

 

 

Comments


  1. Great family scenes: Ivy Compton-Burnett, and often ghastly families!
    I love the whole 44 Scotland Street 'family' of Alexander McCall Smith, except for Irene.
    Dr Farady in Sarah Waters' The Little Stranger is a character who falls in love with a family, and it doesn't end well.
    I read the Barbara Trapido ages ago, and look forward to what you say about it.

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    1. Oh great additions. IC-B you wouldn't on the whole fall in love with.
      Very good call on the Sarah Waters - what a very creepy book that was.
      I loved reading the Trapido again - one never knows if a great favourite will survive, but this one did.

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    2. Thank you for the Trapido rec--I loved it!

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    3. So glad to hear that! Post coming soon

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  2. Books where a character becomes enchanted with the whole family: Little Women immediately sprang to mind. Laurie, Mr Lawrence, and Mr Brooke are all enchanted by the March family, with happy results.
    Family that I became enchanted with: Sidney Taylor’s All of a Kind Family. They always seemed so fun and loving.

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    1. Oh yes, I hadn't thought of Little Women like that, but that's exactly right.
      I don't think I know the All of a Kind Family - I will investigate.

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    2. As I read this post of course I started thinking of families in fiction, and the March family was the first one to come to mind. I cannot decide what I personally think of them, but I laud the way Alcott shows us a family of females - Marmee, the girls and Hannah - functioning perfectly well without male interference while the male household next door - Mr Laurence, Mr Brooke and Laurie (yes, I know the Laurences have lots of servants and several of them obviously female, but they are not part of the family the way Hannah is) - clearly does not.

      And I still remember an occasion more than 40 years ago when I was temporarily a teacher at a Swedish "högstadieskola" (13- to 16-year-olds) and did a project on classic juvenile fiction for a class of 14-year-olds. With the help of the school librarian I had collected a stash of books for the pupils to choose between, and one boy picked Little Women. I am ashamed to admit that I almost stopped him, thinking he would not like it, that it would be to girly for him, but my feminist conscience thankfully would not let me, so I said nothing. As they returned the books two weeks later I asked him what he thought of the book and he beamed back at me: "It was JUST my kind of book - have you got any more like this?" I wonder if he fell in love with March family.

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    3. What a lovely story, and what a sensible young man. My own son absolutely loved the Anne of Green Gables books and read any he could get his hands on: I don't think most people would be giving them to boys.
      I had a girl and a boy: a weird and unexpected advantage of that configuration is that we had toys and books for both sexes to hand, so both could try out a bit of everything.
      I hope I need hardly say that I was never encouraging them to segregate books, toys, clothes etc as boys' or girls' - but in the nature of life, it was great that they could slide into both so easily.

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  3. It was lovely to open Twitter today and find the Casssons there, thanks so much, dear Alabama Crimson. How they all would have pounced on your name-even wicked old Bill would have been intrigued enough to raise an eyebrow, at the very least. (He'd probably have fished for your address and suggested a little gallery tbh..)
    I see the Durrells have already been mentioned. They came first to mind, followed swiftly by the Bastables, Moffats, Ruggles and Fossils. The Mortmains too, and Marches and Bennetts and Rakonitzes (I would love to live next door).
    Do the Fossils count? I think they should, and Anne and Marilla and Matthew? They seem the essence of family life to me.
    Story book families, almost always so much easier than real life. Not every time though- did you ever read Henry Williamson's Chronicles of Ancient Sunlight, and The Flax of Dream quartet?
    There's a new family coming to the block, by the way. Led by MacKenzie Bly, dreamed up by Lissa Evans.

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    1. Re. The Henry Williamson discussion, I completely agreed that he was a piece of work, and must have been horrible to live with. However, he had a way with words. I think I began TFOD quartet with Dandelion Days (the 2nd). The 3rd (A Dream of Fair Women) is also good- they are very young, and a bit self consciously naive, as Dodie Smith puts it, but I think worth reading. Chronicles of Ancient Sunlight is another matter. The difficult son/father relationship is painful to read. What is useful about them is that they are such a detailed domestic social/period history. Just the day to day details of how people lived and travelled and worked. I've only skim read the post WW1 books though- they get increasingly impossible.

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    2. I am going to have to try him. I do love sociological details in a novel above all things...

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  4. Sorry, A C, didn't mean to be anon.

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    1. Great families for the list - yes Rakonitzes, even though can't keep their famliy tree straight 😀😀😀
      And yes, Fossils must count.
      Henry Williamson I haven't read, and probably only you could make me sample. Honestly, I always assumed he was awful - fascist tendencies? I will take a look.
      Lissa, like you, can do no wrong in my eyes. It will be wonderful

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    2. Williamson went beyond mere "fascist tendencies": an out-and-out nazi. The trouble is he can be a very good writer. The Flax of Dream both shows how well he can write and how he ended up like that; Chronicles of Ancient Sunlight are entirely from his own viewpoint.

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    3. Whoops! Roger again.

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    4. thanks - if I were going to try him where should I start?

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    5. The Patriot’s Progress is a grim satire about WWI. The Flax of Dream is an autobiographical novel: a young man's book, but a good one. Except for the animal stories, all the books I've come across are autobiographical, but what I've looked at in Chronicles of Ancient Sunlight is self-justification too. Williamson could not/would not acknowledge he might be wrong.

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    6. Mmmm - you're not selling it to me, but I can try out one of the Flax books...

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    7. Flax was written in the 1920s and 30s. I can just about accept and attribute to youthful folly someone who talks about what a nice and wonderful chap Hitler or Stalin were then, but someone who says the same thing over and over again years later has probably become obsessive and lost any reason they ever had.

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    8. Indeed. Very much so. I will take a cautious look.

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  5. The Carey family from “Mother Carey’s Chickens” by Kate Douglas Wiggin are delightful. (Mrs. Carey refers to her four children as “chickens”. There are no actual chickens in the book that I remember.) The story takes place in Maine around 1910.

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    1. Now, I don't know Mother Carey's Chickens, but this author wrote Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm, right? I will look up this one..

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  6. Yes, it is wonderful.
    I don't mind about the Rakonitzes family tree (they argued about it themselves) so long as I can find paragraphs like this:
    'The family were rich- Danny noticed that at once- especially the Uncles. They used to draw little packets out of their pockets, and shake the contents on to the table, and sometimes invite the Matriarch or Aunt Elsa, or Haidee Power if she was there, to chose one. Just imagine it! Rubies rolling all over the table, and sometimes they danced like drops of flashing red dew over the edge and on to the carpet, and Danny and Toni would scramble to pick them up.'

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    1. Oh you make me want to read them all over again. And yes, they are amusing about the family tree, and there are actual mistakes? But as you say - who cares. Magic moments that I remember so well.

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  7. The Rays in the Betsy-Tacy books and the Malones in the Beany Malone series are both familes one falls in love with. I also enjoy the Wayne family in the Elizabeth Cadell trilogy that begins with The Lark Shall Sing. Joan Aiken's Armitage family are as quirky as the Cassons but also have magical powers, as I recall. Most of the Streatfeild families are appealing - I am particularly fond of the Johnsons in White Boots/Skating Shoes. I also like the extended Haverard family in the Elfrida Vipont books, except for mean Cousin Laura!

    I agree that the Lampreys were more winsome when I encountered them as a teen, although their kindness to Roberta saves the book. I will find you a copy of All of a Kind Family if no libraries in the UK have it; you will like it.

    Constance

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    1. Betsy Tacy I did venture into a year or so ago. I have an Elizabeth Cadell book waiting on my Kindle, but not perhaps one of a trilogy.
      I like some of the Streatfeild famliies, though I have complaints about them. But the Fossils will always have a place in my heart.
      I read all the Vipont books - and have blogged on a few - though found them less satisfactory as an adult.
      What a kind offer! I will look it up and see if I can find it. [Pause] Looks like I can! There is even an audiobook. I am always fascinated by the immigrant experience - whenever I visit NY I visit the Tenement Museum and do a different tour...

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  8. "It is fair to say I fell in love with them." Not a fan of Dad.

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    1. Indeed. I do say at the end that the fathers can be problematic in my favourite families....

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  9. Stella Gibbons' Westwood (1946) is the touching story of Margaret Steggins who falls in love with the Challis family who are artistic, fun, comparatively wealthy and , she thinks, kind. However, gradually the scales fall from her eyes as she realises how badly she has misjudged them and the motivations of others in her life...set in atmospheric Hampstead/Highgate North London during WW2. This a longer and more complex book than Cold Comfort Farm and very different in tone but my favourite of her non CCF books. Excellent on clothes and class and a little autobiographical.
    CCF with Flora Poste learning to love her colourful rural Starkadder relations, whilst acknowledging their many eccentricities is a variation on the theme and more of a satire. I would very much like a copy of The Higher Commonsense, though.

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    1. Oh yes! It's very cleverly done, and sad the way she realizes she has invested so much in people who see her as a trivial person. I have done a couple of posts on it, finding great utility clothes at the Imperial War Museum.

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  10. Thank you for IWM -information and I should have checked your posts. I enjoy the specificity of her clothes descriptions. The reader is left in no doubt exactly what is worn and why.

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    1. I don't expect anyone to check back - I have done so many now! I love the IWM's collection of home front clothes, and have used a lot of them.
      And yes, Gibbons usually very good on what people wear.

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    2. The family in The Matchmaker was one of the hard-to-love ones, for me anyway. A nicer one would be Mrs Tim's family. Also maybe the Provincial Lady's family, despite Robert's grumpiness (or even because of it).

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    3. Given the famous remark about happy families being all the same, I wouldn't expect to find many loveable ones in adult fiction--quite the opposite! Unlovable families must be much more fun to write about. Mrs Oliphant had some nice families, but it was the black sheep who provided most of the interest.

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    4. I agree about the Matchmaker. I think Provinical Lady's children were too young to judge them, and Robert was a grump as you say - I don't warm to them as a famliy...
      Mrs O could do it all. She had nice ones, but also.... I particularly liked the hideous Wentworth family in The Perpetual Curate, which you recommended to me I think.
      And now I'm remembering the famliy in Sylvia Townsend Warner's The Flint Anchor, memorably awful

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  11. I am definitely more in sympathy with Lady Marchmain now that I'm older - also Mrs. Bennet a little bit, but that's another story. Coming from a very quiet, reserved family, I was always drawn to large, talkative families in my reading. Loved E. Nesbit's families! I liked reading about them even when I wouldn't have desired their life, like Laurie Lee's family in Cider With Rosie for example. I should have had sympathy for quiet, bookish heroines, but that was too close to home. My real aspirational reading, however, was boarding school stories.....
    Nerys

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    1. My favourite stepmother is Topaz from I Capture the Castle: a book I first read when I was around 14. I have read it regularly ever since, and still remember the surprise I felt when I realized I was now older than Topaz. I felt I had made it to be a grownup.
      Ah school stories - I'm with you there. How I loved them. I was quite convinced life would have nothing better to offer than going to a boarding school, but quite certainly I would have hated it.

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  12. Definitely the Durrell clan, although if I'm being realistic, I think they might wear thin after a while. Now I know just how much Gerry fictionalised and sensationalised his childhood memoirs (especially erasing Larry's wife altogether), I think we can safely include them under fictional families.

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    1. Yes I believe so. they have certainly been a popular choice amongst people discussing this online.

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  13. I have a soft spot for the Ingalls family in the Little House books, not quite the same as the TV series. Real people, I know, but their experiences were softened up for children's reading so they're close to fictional to me.

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    1. Yes indeed - I didn't have those when I was a child, but my own children liked them

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  14. I would suggest the Moomin family as a lovely fictional family. I remember a scene where Snufkin the wanderer realises he doesn't really want to go away because they haven't tried to make him stay. Also from childrens' books, I always loved the Walker family as a whole - they worked so well together as a unit.

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    1. Moomins, yes - all in favour of them.
      The Swallows & Amazons Walkers? How could I forget them, and also the Blacketts

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    2. I think the trick here is to try to avoid books written for children/younger readers as they're more likely to have lovely, flawed but realistically likeable families in them! Meanwhile when you read "grown up books" it feels like it's tougher to find genuinely likeable families and if you're supposed to like them it often falls flat (Lampreys would be the prime example of this).

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    3. That wasn't meant to be a reply to a comment I hasten to add

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    4. "Better Drowned Than Duffers If Not Duffers Won’t Drown"
      I can see Father's telegram going down a treat when they read it out at the inquest.

      - Roger

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    5. Yes Daniel - it is definitely harder to find realistic families for adults to love.

      Roger - I expect if they were poor children they'd have been taken away from their negligent famliies and put into care

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    6. I was turning over the Swallows and Amazons in my mind for days. I think Dot and Dick could be said to have fallen in love with the other two families, or at least they really wanted to be more like them. (It was a great moment when the D's proved they could skate better than the others!)

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    7. Yes, good take. And they set off on that expedition in Winter Holiday - which really should be cancelled - because they don't want the other families to think they're feeble or have let them down. (Boy would that be a setup for tragedy in a different type of book)

      I read a take on the S&A books with the claim that D&D were incredibly unusual in books of the era because they were intellectuals without being either mock-able or else sidelined as bit players.

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    8. As I recall, Dick is oblivious to the fact that he might not be cool enough to hang out with the S&As but Dorothea is much more clueful - glad to be accepted rather than grateful - and aware it might not have happened.

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    9. I'd forgotten that nuance - time for a re-read

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  15. I did like the family in "The Fortnight in September". As a reader one laughs at their small concerns, while also really symphathizing with them.

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    1. Oh YES, they were marvellous, a great family to fall in love with

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    2. I just read this - one of many books I’ve discovered on your blog, thank you! Its quiet power amazed me. There is such an undercurrent of dread about reading books set in the 1930s - can’t help worrying about Dick and Ernie.
      Nerys

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    3. Yes I know exactly what you mean - you can't quite settle with a 1930s book without worrying.

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  16. Regarding families you can't quite fall for, I never got to like the Elliott family in the Elizabeth Goudge trilogy, especially the matriarch who really seemed rather high-handed to me. I like Goudge books in general, and she didn't try to make the Elliotts perfect, but I just didn't "go for" them.

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    1. No, I know what you mean.
      And now I am remembering the Faraday family in Margery Allingham's Police at the Funeral. Not on the whole an attractive lot.

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    2. Another Allingham family, the Palinodes in More Work for the Undertaker, could be entertaining or off-putting depending on your tastes. Not lovable, though, except maybe for the "offshoot"?

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    3. Yes good catch, mixed reaction....

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